March 19, 2011

Oldies but Goldies?!

This blog supposed to have funny dating stories, but somehow CJ turned things into a bitter story. Anyways, since he is in the past, it's time to talk about some funny stuff. The stuff that I always tell my friends and they keep telling me that I need to write these down and should make it a book. Well....obviously it's not a book,  but! it's even better. It's a blog that I can keep adding new stuff. So, where to start?

Let's start from the last frog I dated.

Actually I mentioned him before in my blog; the So Called Tall B. However, you don't know the latest news. So, get your tea/coffee/cola whatever you I like to drink and start reading. I have my tea that is microwaved two times, because I keep forgetting to drink it LOL.

I haven't seen So Called Tall B since our first date. It was our first and the last date. THANK GOD!

If only I wasn't such a nice person I would turn my back, get into my car and drive off ASAP as fast as possible. Not that he was ugly or anything, but he has a baby-face. He claimed he was twenty-three, but he was not looking a day older than seventeen which was a sudden turn of for me. Plus he was skinny. I like hunks! Definitely not Mike the Situation type of morons, but mostly football players with a cute face on top of a perfect body. Anyways...

You already know what happened in our date. If you don't here is the "link". It was the longest date of my life! However, I shouldn't forget the moron I dated before him. These last two frogs....OMG they make me speechless which is quite unusual for me, because my friends know that it's something really really rare for me.

Long story short, I ran into this guy at a friends party. Our mutual friend/who set me up with this weird frog, So Called Tall B wanted me to invite him, but I came up with this excuse that it's not my party, so I cannot invite his friend So Called Tall B. Then of course he asked my friend whom the party was for. Although I warned her about this, and I asked her not to invite him! but of course she's too soft on people (most of the time) and she couldn't say no and kind of invited this So Called Tall B guy. Grrrr! However, I still had my hopes high and thought he wouldn't come. It turned out that I was wrong :(

He showed up with our mutual friend and some other moron looking guy. I know they say never judge a book by it's cover. However, most of the times the cover gives away the most important details that you need. It's same for people. Some people's moronness (is that even a word? lol who cares I'm the boss here;) )and their ugly personality can be clearly seen on their faces. This guy that they brought with them was definitely a moron and for some reason he was so happy when he saw me. "Buddy you just met me why do you look at me like a dog who just reunited with his owner after so many years?!" Whatever clearly he was a desperate frog...

I decided to be cold to So Called Tall B, because I knew that he still had his hopes. (P.S. We only contacted by commenting each others' status twice since the coffee date. The first one, I suggested him soothing linen spray for his insomnia and then he commented on my status about sending a check without a date on it.)
He saw me, but I pretended like I haven't seen him and I pretended like I just saw our mutual friend. After saying Hi to him and his girlfriend, I shook So Called Tall B's hand and that was it.

When I decided to relax, I realized he was following me around in the small ass bar. When I was talking to a guy he  was right behind us with a cold, bad ass expression on his face. I was changing places and then I was founding him right behind me again and again. It wasn't cute! He was quite creepy, because he almost had no humanly emotions on his face.  I couldn't talk to my friends more than two minutes, because I had to change places constantly. I was like "I'll be back in 5"

When my friend T was going outside to smoke, I was going outside as well so that I could leave him inside, and breathe for few minutes. However, the last time I went outside he followed me. Few seconds after I went outside, he came outside as well, and that was it for me! That was just too much. He followed me around all night as if we were attached at the hip. He was so close to me when I was talking to a guy that was just plain creepy and annoying. After he came outside, I said it's too cold which was not a lie, and I went in and I used my friends as a camouflage/barrier. I don't know if he saw me or he decided to give up, but he disappeared for 10 minutes. I cannot tell you how relieved I was. I was happy like a dog without any fleas.

Then, of course something weird had to happen. The third wheel, who came with our friend Owl and So Called Tall B, kept asking "Did you see my friends? Where are my friends? Did they leave? Did they go outside? Did they leave? Did they leave?" I don't know how old that moron was, but he was a grown up ass man acting like a child who was left at the mall by his mother. He kept repeating "Where are my friends?" question for twenty times or maybe even more that I just wanted to slap him across his face and wanted to say "GROW UP MORON! It's not the end of the world! Get a cab, or ask someone to drive you home, buddy."

Then the Moron's friends, Owl and So Called B showed up. At first I didn't realize, but their mood was changed. I think the Owl was more relaxed and happier and then I looked at So Called B, and had to take another look at him. He was dancing like a crazy monkey. If you haven't guessed yet. Yes, they probably had a special cocktail at the restroom.

The Owl even dared to ask me if I smoke weed or if I snort. I have never used any drugs in my life and I am perfectly fine this way. So, I was really offended by his question and he had to take it back, said sorry and said "I was just asking". Well...YOU MORON YOU BETTER NEVER DARE TO SEE ME AGAIN!

I don't know if So Called Tall B thought his crazy monkey dance was not appreciated enough or he felt sleepy or wanted to have another cocktail, but he left with his Moron friend, the Third Wheel. He kissed my friend T goodbye, and before he could do any moves I made the move to shake his hand. So, we had a cold and-Thank God-short hand shake and he left.

After that traumatizing night I felt too much undisguised and blocked him, and the Owl from seeing my fb wall and all my pictures. I do not need their so called friendship. I guess he got my message, or because I was cold to him that night, and didn't talk to him nor pay attention to him, he deleted me from his fb. I could not be any more happier!

You may think that I am exaggerating, but you need to surround yourself with good people to have a healthy and happy life. Obviously, these people are nothing but germs!

You think that was the end of the story? You are wrong! Chapter Two is coming up shortly, "The Owl thinks he can date me".

See you soon...


You are no good for me!

P.S. Please Do not forget to help out Japan! 

1 comment:

  1. oh wow I would freak out, too if someone was following me around. That's not fun!